Have you ever had a really bad day? Maybe you’ve had more than one.
He-Who’s grandkids use these two phrases frequently, “Best day ever!” and “Worst day ever!” I’m happy to say that the first one is the one most often heard.
There are times when I think most of my days are really bad days. The movie, Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day isn’t doing much better. I wasn’t able to find a favourable review. That is really saying something considering Steve Carell and Jennifer Garner are the “names” attached to the movie. It is based on the beloved book, Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day written by Judith Viorst and delightfully illustrated by Ray Cruz. With multiple awards and a considerable loyal following for more than 40 years, let’s just say the book faired much better than the movie. I’ve always thought the book was somehow about me.
Let’s pick a random day from this year. I’m going with Thursday June 12th, 2014. Please note the very next day was Friday the 13th. I did not pick Friday the 13th because one would expect a THNGVBD (Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day) on Friday the 13th and truth be told, mine wasn’t too bad. I work from home most days but occasionally will freelance on site for a client. When you work from home, most of the time you tend to let your wardrobe get a little thin. Speaking of thin, I’ve lost some weight this year and didn’t realize that it could be a problem until I was dressing to work in a client’s office the morning of June 12th. As a rule, the fact that everything I had to wear was too big would be cause for celebration. Unfortunately, I had to find something I could wear. Immediately! By the time I got to the office I had done a pretty good job of convincing myself that I had put together an outfit that would do for the day. I was busy and soon forgot about my baggy appearance. I forgot — until I heard a very loud tearing noise as I scooched through a doorway that was semi-blocked. The fabric of my baggy pants had caught on the door frame and ripped as I passed through. Upon inspection, the general consensus was that my top was long enough to cover up the damage and no one would be any wiser. That was…until I sat down. That was when the tear expanded and I ended up with what was once the seat of my pants flapping like a trap door below my cover-up line.
It has often been said that I have a good sense of humour and as such, was happy to provide my co-workers with their laugh for the day. Obviously there was some emergency shopping that needed to be done so I called He-Who to come and rescue me. He offered to bring me a change of clothing. Now I ask you, how is that the solution to such an embarrassing situation? If ever I deserved to buy a piece of clothing it was right then. Once He-Who showed up, he finally agreed to take me to the store I requested. That is, once he stopped laughing enough that he could drive. While I was shopping, he sat patiently in the car (patiently for him…he only called me once from the car) while I chose replacement pants.
It was agreed that we would stop for supper on our way home. There was a Mexican place He-Who wanted to try. I would have agreed to anything just so I wouldn’t have to go home and cook. As we pulled into the plaza where the restaurant was located, we got tangled up in a parking mess. There was parking on both sides of the lot and cars were trolling up and down the middle aisle trying to find a spot. We sat in the same place for some time, trapped between cars. While watching the mess I noticed a gentleman exit one of the businesses and walk towards our car. He then went around the back end of our car and got into his vehicle that was parked on the opposite side. As I watched him I realized that he had started his car and put it in reverse. We were trapped in between two cars and had nowhere to go! It seemed like a good idea to point out that we were about to get hit to my man at the wheel. I screamed, “He-Who, HE-WHO, HE-WHO!“, (ok, ok, I used his real name). As the guy hit the gas and came towards our driver’s side door, He-Who leaned on the horn. The guy didn’t stop until our vehicle stopped him. I have no idea how this guy did not notice us as he detoured around our car to get to his, but in the end most of the damage was done to his vehicle by our side mirror.
We finally made it into the restaurant. It was really busy and smelled delicious. We were very hungry. We got crammed into a corner table for two that had an extra chair stuck on the outside. I had my favourite purse with me so rather than put it on the floor I sat it in the spare chair. In my former life I was known to spend some money on my accessories…especially purses. When my life changed, these treasures were lovingly put away to preserve their exceedingly expensive qualities. Feeling less than professionally dressed that morning, what with my baggy clothes and all, I had decided to let my Matt & Nat bag see the light of day. Yes, I was using it as my security blanket. He-Who ordered a massive dish that arrived before mine and was well into it by the time I heard my sizzling fajitas arriving at the table. It was sputtering and the steam was wafting towards me. The waitress leaned over the chair to place it in front of me. Except that it didn’t make it. No. It slid off the cast iron pan and landed inside my bag. INSIDE MY BAG!
Of course the waitress apologized profusely as she tried to clean up the mess and the owner bought us desert. I spent most of my time taking each thing out of my purse including my cell, wallet and keys and wiping them off. For the record, He-Who never once stopped eating.
I always stop at three. Once I’ve had three “mishaps” in one day it is officially a bad day and I stop counting. I just wish I could say it was my “worse day ever”.